nightmare on ROAD street..........

I went to Mumbai for last week and I found an exciting experience to talk about. For the benefit of every Tom, Dick and Harry, visiting Mumbai and daring to drive on roads, I am offering a few hints for survival. They are applicable to every place in India except Bihar, where life outside a vehicle is only marginally safer.

Indian road rules broadly operate within the domain of karma where you do your best and leave the results to your insurance company.

Do we drive on the left or right of the road? The answer is “both”. Basically you start on the left of the road, unless it is occupied. In that case, go to the right, unless that is also occupied. Then proceed by occupying the next available gap, as in chess.

A few rules that usually come in handy:

Just trust your instincts, ascertain the direction, and proceed

1. Most drivers don’t drive. Except for a belief in reincarnation, the other drivers are not in any better position.
2. Don’t stop at pedestrian crossings just because some fool wants to cross the road.
3. Blowing your horn is not a sign of protest as in some countries. We horn to express joy, resentment, frustration, romance and bare lust (two brisk blasts) or just to mobilize a dozing cow in the middle of the bazaar.
4. Night driving on Indian roads can be an exhilarating experience, because you do not know who amongst the drivers is loaded. What looks like premature dawn on the horizon turns out to be a truck attempting a speed record.
5. During the daytime, trucks are more visible, except that the drivers will never show any signal. You will often observe that the cleaner that sits next to the driver will project his hand and wave hysterically. This is definitely not to be construed as a signal for a left turn. The waving is just an expression of physical relief on a hot day.

PS: Pune is no better. Hailing from Calcutta and completing education & the first few years of my job life in Delhi & traveling to the south on business – I can basically comment that traffic all over India is chaotic & people are no different. Only Goa I guess was an exception – no traffic signals and more or less sensible people behind the wheels.

Then again this is India Roads 2.0 (more money à faster cars à same people behind the wheels à same dilapidating roads à Chaos Unlimited)

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